Headship

Eph.5: ²¹ “And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. ²² For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord… ²⁵ For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her”

Great leaders [parents] exercise their authority within the boundaries of love, wisdom, and sufficiency. Anything outside of this will lead to abuse. 

The Bible did not say, ‘…husbands subdue your wives…’ In many cases, husbands want to subdue their wives because we believe the woman is stubborn.God has not said husbands should subdue their wives. God says husbands are to love their wives and the wives are to submit to their own husbands. 1 Cor.13:⁴ “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud ⁵ or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.” Love looks for another way of making sure things get done.

Leaders must be secure in themselves. Parenting is leadership and as a parent, you must be sufficient in yourself. You must be able to be by yourself and be secure. You must not use your child to meet your own needs. This is one area a lot of people struggle. When a father or mother uses a child to meet his or her un-met needs or dreams, authority easily leads to abuse. It is abuse to try to get from your child the affection you are lacking from your spouse. The way some parents cuddle their children is just wrong. If you have lust then go to God and deal with it. If you continue, you are abusing that child. You do not fulfill your lust on your children. That is why abuse happens in families.

As a parent [a leader], sometimes you will need to make tough decisions. However, if a parent has become emotionally dependent on a child, he or she would be incapable of making the tough decisions when it comes to that child. As a leader, you cannot afford to become emotionally dependent on the people you are leading. You will not be able to say no when you should and that is poor leadership, poor parenting. A wise father once said to his son, “If I ever have to choose between being your father and your friend, I will always choose the role of your father. You have many friends, but you have only one father.” Sacrificing your role as a parent on the altar of friendship, is depriving your child.

Prayer: Holy Spirit, please give me the wisdom and knowledge to lead Your children properly, so that they will never depart from the way of the Lord, in Jesus Name. Amen!