You Must III

Eph.4:32 “Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you” [with emphasis].

If love is to last in our relationships, we must Listen with all our hearts and Forgive with all our hearts. Yesterday we explained the difference between acceptance and forgiveness. However, some issues in marriage are actually forgiveness issues. Relationships are between two imperfect people. They are going to step on each other’s toes and say hurtful things. Someone is going to be careless and be out rightly nasty but God wants us to forgive.

Eph.4:32 “Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you” [with emphasis]. After reading this scripture, I said to the Lord, instead of “forgiving one another”, it should have been “not offending one another”. But God knows that we are broken people. God knows that it is impossible for us not to offend each other so He says forgive. Someone says, “Marriage is a union of two great forgivers”. You have to forgive and keep on forgiving. Make up your mind in advance.

For love to last, the third thing I must do is be humble with all my heart. We could say be unselfish with all your heart because it is a subsect of being humble. Selfishness is a major destroyer of marriage. When two people in a marriage label things as ‘mine’ and ‘do not touch’, there are bound to be issues. The man decides to drink a cup of coffee and the wife insists he must not use her mug. Or the woman is eating her dinner and the man insists she must not use his spoon. As simple as that is, sometimes it can get worse because it magnifies selfishness.

I was having a session with a man that was insisting on being selfish in his marriage. I recommended that he take some steps and ask God for help because his marriage was heading for the rocks. Sometimes we think because we are Christians and God hates divorce, we can do anything we want. That is foolishness. If you keep on being selfish to that woman you will terminate your marriage with your own hands. The man insisted on being selfish and his marriage ended. Selfishness is a huge destroyer; like a cankerworm.

Prayer: Holy Spirit, help me listen with all my heart, forgive with all my heart and be totally selfless in my relationships, in Jesus Name. Amen!