Off Limits!

“Bad companions ruin good character.”  1 Cor. 15:33 [GN]

When affairs and illicit sex happen, they happen with three main categories of people. The first category is friends [family friends]. It is well documented that most affairs occur between couples that are friends. Why am I exposing this? It is so that you know what to watch out for and what to guard against. Does it mean you would not have friends? Of course you should have friends. Your friend came to visit with your family, then you leave her at midnight to watch a movie with your husband and you go upstairs to sleep. Or she is sleeping in the room downstairs and unknown to you, your husband snuck downstairs in the early hours of the morning. Standard procedure!

Do not be like the ostrich that buries its head in the sand and thinks its whole body is safe from danger. The second category is family members. The niece goes to stay with her uncle and his wife; the woman goes to the market and… standard plot. The driver is always carrying things to mummy’s room upstairs when daddy is not at home… standard plot! Be wise! The third category is Co-workers. Affairs and illicit sex happens most frequently between coworkers because many times, you spend more time with your colleagues than your spouse. And if you are not careful and guarded, you begin to take the step. It starts with the mind accepting it, then emotional non-physical involvement but involvement nonetheless. Then physical involvement, then it becomes justified and the cycle continues.

What is the solution? Are we supposed to go around suspecting family members? You may not be able to choose your family or colleagues but at least you can choose your friends. Start with choosing good friends by the help of the Holy Spirit. When it comes to family, keep your eyes open. And with coworkers, stay alert. The solution is actually very simple and it is to establish protective guidelines. Some things must be off limits. You must never ever discuss your sex life with your colleague. Never ever allow another woman to talk about your wife and how she can do a better job at taking care of you. Off limits!

Prayer: Holy Spirit, help my spouse and I to establish protective guidelines in our relationship and our relationships with other people, in Jesus Name.